What Should You Tell Your Children During Divorce?
One of the most challenging aspects of going through a divorce is explaining it to your children. At the law firm of Anne E. Raduns, P.A., we understand this difficulty. While our focus is on the legal aspects of divorce, we see these issues played out all the time.
Based on what we have seen, we have some suggestions regarding what to tell your children about divorce:
Talk To Your Lawyer Before Talking To Your Children Or Your Spouse
The sooner you turn to us for help, the sooner we can provide it. When you enlist us, we will take great care to review your situation and provide personalized guidance regarding what to tell your children, and even your spouse, about the divorce. We can help you avoid common mistakes that could have a lasting impact. By taking the time to consult an experienced divorce attorney before doing anything else, you can clear up any of your own questions and ensure that you are prepared to help the rest of your family to prepare for the process.
Details Should Stay Between You And Your Spouse
You may be angry at your spouse. That’s common. Feel free to discuss that anger with your spouse, your friends, your counselor or with us. Please do not discuss it with your children. Not only can this be very hard on your children emotionally, but your behavior could have an impact on the outcome of your case. If, for example, you are accused of attempting to cause your children to become estranged toward the other parent, this could cost you rights of child custody, since the family law courts prefer to award custody to the parent who is more likely to encourage a healthy relationship between the children and the other parent.
Let Your Children Know That You And Your Spouse Will Work Together
Despite the feelings you may have about your spouse, you are both still parents. The child will benefit from the two of you working together to create a new co-parenting relationship. The more effectively that relationship functions, the better off your child will be. Children need to know that they can depend on both their mother and their father, and they do far better in life when they do not feel that they are being expected to take sides or choose a “favorite” parent.
Tell Your Children That They Still Have Two Parents
When it comes to determining what to tell your children about divorce, perhaps the most important thing to say is that they will still have two parents. Be honest about how the parental relationship will change, but make it clear that you will both still be there. As challenging as this situation may be for you, it is in all likelihood even more upsetting for your children, and you need to do whatever you can to provide them with stability.
At Anne E. Raduns, P.A., we understand how much is at stake for you and your children, and we want to help you pursue an outcome which makes it as easy as possible for everyone involved to move smoothly into the future. We will use our experience to assist with the creation of child custody agreements and parenting plans, with the goal of enabling you to spend as much time as possible with your child.
Call us at 352-877-3786 or complete our contact form so that we can answer your questions and help you begin working on a strategy for resolving your divorce with a minimum of emotional trauma for your children.